Starting Over
by Carrie6
Summary: Post Season 3 Premiere. JimPam. Chapter 5 is up!
1. First Phone Call

Starting Over

Chapter 1: First Phone Call

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

A/N: Hey guys – so although I was able to wait an entire summer for more Office, (perhaps because of the constant influx of fanfic) I am unable to wait a week for the next episode. Here's a little fic taking place after the season 3 premier (Gay Witch Hunt) to get me (and maybe some others) through the next week. I might add to it this week if I feel inspired (reviews tend to do that to me, wink wink) or maybe follow the season with it, or go off in a totally different direction. It's completely up in the air! Also note, if I add more chapters they'll most likely be rated T.

Enjoy!

-----------------------------

­

As Pam watched Dwight positively identify himself as a homosexual with his "Gay-dar," she laughed to herself and looked over at Ryan's desk for the thousandth time that day.

She knew what she had to do. She shook her head as she dialed. _How can he get to me from 100 miles away?_

"Dunder Mifflin this is Elizabeth," the receptionist chirped.

"Jim Halpert please," she said softly, not wanting anyone to know who she was calling—there were enough rumors already.

"One second, I'll transfer you."

Pam held her breath as soft music came on.

There was a click and then, "Jim Halpert."

She didn't realize how much she'd missed his voice. "So—interesting fact. As it turns out, every member of Dunder-Mifflin, Scranton is homosexual. Can you believe it?"

"Wow! It must be so liberating to work in such a progressive environment," he quipped back, not missing a beat.

"It really is…you have no idea." She replied, laughing easily.

"So I guess Dwight got my present." Jim asked.

"Oh yes and we all appreciate it. Especially Oscar—who, by the way, _IS_ a homosexual."

"Wait, really?"

"Yup. He came out today. Well, technically, Michael came out _for_ him. And then kissed him."

"What? No way. I can't believe I missed that!"

"Serves you right for being a hot-shot paper salesman all the way in Stamford." She joked, but with a twinge of resentment that he'd actually left.

"Oh yeah. Before long I'm gonna be selling paper to the president. You just wait."

"I have no doubt."

They both laughed at their casual banter.

"You're not going to believe this, but I actually miss Scranton," he said, the tone of his voice not quite conveying the light heartedness she knew he'd wanted it to.

"Really?" She knew she had no right but hoped he missed _her_.

"It's just not the same here." He said, his voice a little too serious. Shifting gears he added, "You know, different people react very differently to their possessions being jello-ed.

"Is that a fact?" she laughed.

"Um hum," he replied in a way that was so _Jim._

An easy silence fell between them before she remembered. "Oh! How was Australia? Tell me everything!"

"Oh, right. It was great. You know, kangaroos, dingos, people saying 'G'day, mate!' Did some snorkeling…" He trailed off, not sounding as excited as she thought he would have.

"Wow, I bet it was amazing. I wish I could have gone." She would have killed to go to Australia. She thought momentarily about how much fun she would have had there with Jim.

"Well, you were busy." She couldn't exactly tell, but he sounded almost angry. She heard him take a deep breath before asking "How was the wedding?"

_What? She couldn't believe it. He didn't know._ "Oh, um…I thought you'd heard. I um, called off the wedding."

He didn't say anything for a long time. "Wow. Um, wow. That's…huge. Are you okay?" He asked, genuinely concerned.

She smiled. "Yeah, I am actually."

"Why—I mean, what happened?"

"I just…knew that I didn't want to spend the rest of my life with Roy." She got nervous when he didn't respond right away. She needed him to know that she was okay. "And plus, after paying for all that food, I really wanted to eat it myself. I have lunch for the next five weeks."

He laughed, "Well that's only fair."

The silence that followed wasn't as easy as the last and she wondered who was going to turn the conversation.

"Pam I know I shouldn't say this, but I uh…I'm really happy you didn't marry Roy."

The pressure started building behind her eyes. She wasn't ready to hear this. "Jim—"

"No, I know, I just…you deserve a lot better."

Tears welled in her eyes and if she didn't end the conversation right away she was going to make a scene in the office.

"Thanks." She said softly, her voice shaking a little more than she would have liked.

"Okay, well, I've got to go, but it was so good to talk to you," his pleasant tone returning.

"Yeah, you too," she said, a little sad that she didn't know when she would talk to him again.

"And just remember – never be ashamed of who you are. You're here, you're queer, get used to it."

"Sure thing, Jim," she laughed.

"Bye, Pam." She'd missed how he said her name. _With love_, she thought quickly before brushing that thought away.

"Bye," she replied, reluctantly hanging up the phone.

She took a deep, shuttering breath and felt her heart ache. _How did this happen? _For awhile she'd convinced herself that she missed having her best friend around. It didn't take long for her to admit that it was more than that. He'd made it more when he'd kissed her and as hard as she fought it, memories from months ago flooded her mind.

_His hands were on her back as he crushed his lips to hers. She was surprised how easily she sank into his touch and how good his lips felt on hers. Her hands moved to his cheek of their own accord and when he pulled back she wasn't ready for it to end._

_His shocked expression turned into a smile that melted her heart. Her hands slid down his chest and took his own. She couldn't help but smile back. "You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that" he said, his eyes shining._

"_Me too," she said, surprising even herself. "I think we're just drunk," she rationalized, looking for some excuse for their behavior._

"_No, I'm not drunk," he said, his smile faltered as his eyebrows furrowed. "Are you drunk?"_

"_No," she remembered. She wasn't. Then why did she _feel_ drunk. Her head was swimming and her fingers were tingling and she was kissing _Jim_ for Christ's sake. How could she not be drunk?_

_He leaned in again and her conscious kicked in. "Jim," she said, pushing him away. She could see the disappointment and sad realization in his eyes._

"_You're really gonna marry him?" he asked, like he couldn't really believe it._

_She couldn't even speak. She just nodded. She'd been waiting three years to marry Roy. How could she not now that the wedding was only three weeks away._

"_Okay." He resigned. She believed him. It was okay. This was Jim, her best friend. She could see through the hurt and disappointment that he was saying "As long as you're happy."_

_He started to walk away but she wasn't ready to let him go. His hands were so warm and she hung onto them until only their fingertips touched. She watched him walk away and tried to push down the lump in her throat. She tried to conjure up thoughts of Roy and the wedding and the lump just got bigger. She realized that her fingers had floated to her lips and a smile had formed there. There was a giddiness bubbling inside her that she didn't know she had. She shouldn't be feeling like this right after she kissed her best friend three weeks before her wedding._

----------------------------- _  
_

"What?" Ryan's voice snapped out of her reverie. She realized she'd been staring at him.

"Oh, nothing. Sorry. I Just spaced out." He shook his head and went back to work.

She went home that night, to her own apartment, still thinking of her conversation with Jim. She hadn't had anyone to banter with lately and she couldn't believe how easy it was to just pick up where they left off. _Well, not quite where we left off,_ she thought.

In the months since she called off the wedding she'd often wondered if he'd try and make contact. If he loved her, like he claimed, wouldn't he try to at least talk to her now that she wasn't married. She'd never considered the thought that he hadn't even known. How would he have? He was in Australia. And now Stamford. What did she think, that when he heard she broke it off with Roy that he would turn down his promotion and come back to Scranton to save her from inappropriate comments from Michael?

The funny thing was, she had.

She remembered going home after the Casino night and climbing into bed next to Roy. She kissed him, trying desperately to remember why she was marrying him. He woke with an "Oh hell yeah!" and pushed himself on top of her. His kiss was forceful, his hands rough on her body. _Has it always been like this?_ She asked herself. He tasted like beer and she found herself turned off by the wetness of his kiss and his lack of finesse as he struggled to undress her.

She tried desperately to push thoughts of Jim from her mind and grasped Roy tighter. She ran her hands over his body and remembered how firm Jim's chest had been under her hands. Her lips were already raw from his stubble and she couldn't help but remember how full and soft Jim's lips had been on hers, tentative but demanding.

She couldn't keep doing this. She suddenly couldn't breathe, feeling suffocated by the weight of Roy on top of her. She pushed him off her, mumbling something about having too much to drink and shutting herself in the bathroom.

She stayed in the bathroom just long enough that she knew Roy was asleep before deciding to sleep on the couch for the night.

The next morning when she'd gotten to work she'd found the letter and nothing was ever the same.

-----------------------------

TBC…? Reviews please!


	2. The Princess Bride

Starting Over

Chapter 2: The Princess Bride

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Wow thanks for all the fab reviews! They totally make my day! You'll be able to tell from this chapter that I'm switching the POV's back and forth—this chapter is Jim's.

---------------------

Jim exhaled deeply and collapsed onto his couch. As strange and taxing as his day had been, he couldn't help the smile that tugged at his lips. The smile that was reserved for _her. _Thoughts zoomed around his head so fast he could barely make sense of them, but the one standing out from the rest was _she didn't marry Roy._

He couldn't believe it. He couldn't believe that he hadn't known. He thought if something like that happened he would have _sensed _it. His smile grew as he thought of why she might have called it off. He couldn't help but think it had something to do with him. After all, she'd been engaged to Roy for three years and right when she's about to walk down the aisle, she decides he's not right for her. _You can't fool me Beesly._

He thought back to Casino Night and felt a pull at his heart that he'd managed to ignore for awhile.

His elation as she kissed him back, his horror and disappointment when she brushed it off as a drunken incident between two apparently sober people. The sad realization that he wasn't enough to convince her not to marry Roy.

He'd come home that night, completely crushed, but at least with some semblance of closure. He would never look back and wonder _what if?_

He sat down and set out to do before he saw her standing at his desk. He explained himself.

_Pam,_

_I know what you're thinking – a letter is incredibly lame. But please, just go with it._

_Believe it or not I didn't start this night thinking I was going to pour my heart out to you. I needed to tell you something else. I'm transferring to Stamford. Jan offered me a promotion and I've decided to take it. I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner._

_I didn't say it earlier, but you have no idea how much your friendship means to me too. Even though I'd hoped we could be more, being with you these past few years has made Scranton bearable. Beyond that – enjoyable. _

_I know you're going to marry Roy, and I'm okay with that, as long as he makes you happy. Don't be mad at me for saying this, but don't give up on your dreams. It's not too late and you have too much talent to waste sitting behind that desk. I know you know it too. I don't want you to ever look back on your life and wonder what could have been if you'd only taken a chance. I know, I know – I'm not one to talk, but I'm trying._

_So, remember to ignore Michael, torture Dwight, and maybe give me a call sometime. Be happy, Pam. I'll miss you._

_Love,_

_Jim_

He'd done it. He'd said his final peace and could now only hope that he could move on with his life. Or at least move.

He'd dropped the letter on her desk long before anyone would come into work. That was the last time he walked into Dunder Mifflin Scranton. His transfer was processed, he took two weeks off to move, and when he arrived in Stamford a box of his belongings from the Scranton office were waiting for him. He wondered who'd packed them.

He'd thought about her every day; imagined her kiss every night. But more than that—he just missed talking to her.

Stamford was fine. It was normal. Boring. Serious. He actually worked hard all day, came home to a sparsely decorated apartment, and he was happy. Lonely, but happy.

Then she called today and he realized how much he'd missed her. He thought that with the distance he'd idolized her and she wasn't all that great. Who was he trying to kid, of course she was. And now she was single.

What did she expect him to do with this knowledge? Why hadn't she told him in the first place? His heart sank as he thought that maybe she just really didn't want to be with him. He couldn't be too upset about that, he had moved away.

He wondered if he'd stayed if things would have been different. Knowing his luck, she would have ended up marrying Roy and he would have had to stand by and watch their newlywed bliss. It was a smart move to transfer. In the long run, he knew he couldn't count on a future with her and accepting the promotion was the only sensible option.

_God _he missed her.

He flipped on the TV, flipped a couple channels and groaned. _Of course,_ he thought. The Princess Bride. It was one of his all time favorite movies, but now every time he saw it all he could think of was actually watching it on a desert island with Pam.

He thought of the hundreds of times he'd thought of her or something she'd like that he wanted to share with her but couldn't. _There's nothing stopping me now,_ he thought. _No Roy, no engagement._

He smiled and picked up the phone. The excitement welled within him as he waited for her to answer.

"Hello," she said.

"Channel 47. Right now. You don't need to thank me."

She laughed, a small gasp and then, "The Princess Bride! Yes!" she exclaimed.

"Oh so you've seen it?" He joked.

"Maybe once," she quipped back. "You seriously just saved me from a night of QVC. I don't think I could have handled that…again."

He laughed as he pictured her sitting on her couch, channel surfing. "Well it's the least I can do after inadvertently outing you to the entire office."

"Yeah, now because of you I'm going to have Michael asking me every day if my girlfriend is going to visit and if we'll make out," she said, mock angry.

He laughed, trying to suppress that image. "Actually, let me know if that happens 'cause I'm gonna want to visit that day," he said, only half kidding. "Only to protect to from Michael of course."

"Of course," she laughed. "Well if that's what it'll take to get you to come visit I might have to consider it," she said, her tone slightly more serious.

_Woah. _Jim thought He didn't know whether to make a joke or keep going with this. He decided to do the latter. "You know I'd come for a lot less."

Somberly, she replied, "I know."

A silence drifted between them, making Jim contemplate if she was just making a joke, or if she really did want to see him.

"Oh!" he said, changing the mood. "This is my favorite!" He put on his best Spanish accent. "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die!"

Pam's laugh filtered through the telephone and Jim was relieved they'd managed to lighten the conversation.

"Seriously Jim, you could take your impressions on the road. You're a true performer," she said, her voice laced with laughter.

"Yeah I'll get right on that. Come on Beesly, you know you're the one with all the talent. You're the one who should be out there." When he realized what he said he back pedaled immediately. "I'm sorry. I know that you don't need…that I shouldn't push you," he apologized.

"No, it's okay," she said, sounding more nervous than upset. "Actually, I've started taking art classes."

"Wow! Pam that's great!"

"Yeah, thanks. I really like it."

"That's really great," he said earnestly. "What kind of class is it?"

"It's an introductory graphic design class. I um, talked to Jan and she recommended that I take it so maybe I can apply for that internship. A new session starts in October," she said, her excitement bubbling through.

"Wow, Pam, that's awesome. You'd be so great at that. I'm so happy for you." _She's finally taking a chance on herself, _he thought.

"Thanks Jim. I um, I just wanted to…" she hesitated, "Oh I love this part!" she said, ignoring the sentence she'd started.

Jim turned his attention to the screen as Westley and Buttercup tumbled down the hill. He chuckled a little. "Yeah, me too." _What was she going to say? _He couldn't help but wonder.

He heard a distant knock over the phone. "Oh—that's my dinner. I ordered Chinese."

"General Tso's?" he asked.

"What else? Ok I gotta go, but thanks for the movie. Talk to you soon?" she asked.

"As you wish," he replied.

She laughed. "Bye Jim."

"Bye Pam."

He hung up the phone and reflected on their conversation for the second time that day. _What was she going to say?_ He had a feeling it was something big.

He was so happy she was taking art classes. She really was talented. Not that he was any great judge of art, but he _knew_ she was good. And more than that, it was something she loved to do. He could picture her face, smiling and lit up as she told him about the class.

He got up and crossed the room to a box he'd still yet to unpack. He opened it and pulled out a sheet of copier paper. He grabbed a piece of take and tacked it up on the wall. It wasn't much, just a pencil sketch of a park you could see from the roof of their office, but he'd always liked it—and the memory it brought of sitting up on the roof with her.

He stared at the sketch. He liked the step they'd taken today. They'd pretty much picked up right where they left off—as friends. As happy as he was about that, he was frustrated with himself that even after moving 150 miles away, he still couldn't shake her. Was this just how it was going to be? He knew what would end up happening. He'd fall in love with her all over again, never move on, and then be crushed when she got a new boyfriend and disappeared from his life.

He couldn't read her over the phone. Although with the way he had misjudged the situation in person, maybe that was a good thing. Still, he couldn't help but remember the way she kissed him back. There was _something_ there, he just knew he had to let her make the first move.

---------------------

TBC…? Review!


	3. Opportunity

Starting Over

Chapter 3: Opportunity

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys! I know it's going a little slowly, but the next chapter's gonna be good…it's all about patience. Don't forget to review!

---------------

Pam settled into the couch with her Chinese and turned back to the movie. She laughed as Westley said "As you wish," but she was too consumed in her thoughts to pay much attention beyond that.

She was happy with her decision not to marry Roy—she was surer of it every day. She liked living alone; she liked the way her life was going. She just hadn't realized how lonely she was until she'd talked to Jim.

She spent the ret of the night absorbed in thought, going through the motions of doing the dishes and locking up the house, not even noticing when she was suddenly sitting on her bed, pulling a crinkled piece of paper from her nightstand drawer.

She'd read it at least a hundred times, mostly in the few weeks between Jim's departure and when she called off the wedding. As much as she told herself that calling off the wedding had nothing to do with Jim, at these moments when she re-read his words in her darkened bedroom, she could admit that wasn't true.

His unfaltering belief in her made her realize that she could be more than just a receptionist. That she deserved better. Better than Scranton. Better than Roy. The combination of his confession, his letter, and his subsequent absence had jolted her out of the daze she'd been living in for 10 years and spurred her into action.

As she read Jim's words once again, she realized that he was the kind of person she needed in her life. She'd known it all along, deep down. But actually seeing it in writing, his support and love for her was so clear she couldn't believe she'd ignored it for so long.

Suddenly, what she'd been thinking about for the past three months (well, three years and three months) became clear. She wanted to be with Jim. She'd told herself for so long that she was happy with her choices so that when Jim kissed her, she didn't even realize what he was offering her – a life. A life that she barely knew she wanted, and that she really didn't think she deserved. Their conversations today had forced her to realize that he was as great as she'd always known he was, and that no matter how far they went from each other, she couldn't keep her thoughts from turning to him. That was much more than friendship. She couldn't believe how long it took her to get to this point, but now that she was there, she only hoped he'd want her again.

She knew she'd have to approach this carefully. She'd hurt Jim a lot and the image of him wiping away his tears as he took her rejection would haunt her always. _I just wasn't ready for him yet,_ she told herself.

A few weeks passed and she was constantly assaulted by thoughts of Jim. She dreamt of him at night and during the day she found herself imagining a life with him. A life filled with laughter, support, and consideration—all the things he'd been giving her for years, asking nothing in return. Now she was ready to start giving back.

They talked frequently, mostly trivial things. Dwight and Angela's budding relationship, Michael's dilemma between his local flavor and big city gal, Jim's new colleagues. With every day, every conversation, every laugh, she fell a little further.

For weeks she'd thought about how she would approach him. She didn't think that "Okay, well I've finally realized how wonderful you are and I'm ready to be together now," had a very romantic ring to it. She also knew she had to take it slow. She'd just come out of a ten year relationship and she didn't want to mess up the best thing in her life.

As it turned out, the opportunity came to her. She waited until she got home to call him, wanting to avoid the knowing stares of her colleagues.

"Hey Beesly," he answered, knowing it was her.

"Hey, guess what?" she could barely contain her excitement.

"Hmm, Dwight accidentally shot himself in the foot with his spud gun?" he ventured.

"If only. No, I got an interview for the internship!" she shrieked.

"That's amazing! Congratulations!" he said, genuinely happy for her.

"Thanks. I can't believe it. I'm so excited!" she beamed

"You should be. When is it?"

"Friday—in New York. I'm thinking I might stay the weekend. I haven't had a vacation in forever," she said, hoping he would understand what she meant.

"That's awesome. You should definitely do that. You're welcome to stay at my place. I'm really close to the city and I've got a ton of room," he offered.

She was speechless. She was just hoping that they could get together, she didn't even imagine staying with him.

He misinterpreted her silence, "Unless…I mean, you probably want to stay in the city."

"No!" she protested, a little too strongly. "I'd love to stay with you. Thanks. Just promise you'll leave room for me on the apartment tour."

"I dunno Beesly, you've got a habit of wandering off. If I lose one more person I'm going to lose my credentials," he joked.

"I promise I'll be good."

"Okay then. I'll count you in.'

"Okay, well I should probably go. I need to call my mom and tell her the news."

"Oh yeah, definitely. So I guess I'll see you in like, 3 days," he said.

"Can't wait," she said honestly.

"Me either. Congratulations again, Pam."

"Thanks, Jim."

They hung up their respective phones and Pam was positively buzzing with excitement. She was giddy in a way that she realized only Jim could make her.

Later that night she'd already started packing her bag for the weekend. She found herself scrutinizing every piece of clothing and wondering if Jim would like it. She couldn't help it. Now that she'd seen him in this new light, he was all that occupied her mind. She couldn't wait to see where this weekend would go.

---------------------

TBC…Review please! Good/bad, keep going/quit forever – let me know! It's so exciting to see 1000 hits, and then so sad when there are only 10 reviews! Anonymous? I don't care! Bring it on!


	4. Second Date

Starting Over

Chapter 4:

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Thank you guys so much for the reviews! They are awesome and make me want to neglect all my other work to write! Here's chapter 4!

--------------------

_She's coming to visit. She's staying with me. _Jim's hands were practically shaking as he hung up the phone. _She's staying with _me In _three days._ She would be sleeping in _his_ house.

He couldn't believe how his life had completely turned around in just a few weeks. Three months ago he'd left Scranton, tail between his legs, thinking he'd never find love again, and now Pam was coming to stay with him for an entire weekend.

_What does this mean? _He wondered. A part of him wanted to believe that it was more than just a friendly stay. Maybe it was the way her voice had sounded a little different lately, or the fact that she'd called _him_ before her mom. He just _felt_ like this weekend was going to be great.

Of course, he'd been wrong before.

Jim spent the next three days throwing himself into work, trying to prevent himself from completely going insane with anticipation. He spent his nights trying to make his apartment looked lived-in (i.e. unpacking boxes, and adding food to his beer collection in the fridge).

They had decided he would pick her up at the Stamford train station after her interview, despite his efforts to let him get her from the city. He left work early Friday afternoon, even though her train didn't come in until 6.

He parked at the train station in prime position to see her arrive, got out of his car and leaned against the door. Looking at his watch, he saw that he had half an hour until her train arrived.

He wondered for the millionth time what this weekend would bring. Although he dared to hope, he was wary simply because he didn't know if he could handle being crushed again. _That's a lie,_ he thought. His heart could break a thousand times if it meant seeing a smile on her face.

Still, he knew that this weekend was different. She was coming to see him completely alone. No cameras scrutinizing their every move, no fiancé waiting for her at home. It would just be the two of them – all weekend. A smile crept onto his face and for once he didn't even try to fight it.

Suddenly, she appeared. Dragging her small suitcase behind her, she smoothed her hair and straightened her skirt before seeking him out. He waved her over and jogged to meet her.

"Hey!" she said as she let go of her bag and threw her arms around him.

"Hey," he replied, still holding her. "God, it's good to see you.

They disengaged and he grabbed her bag. She muttered a "thanks," as she followed him to his car.

"So…" he asked expectantly, "How'd the interview go?"

Her face lit up. "Really well! I think. No, it did," she laughed, "Sorry, I'm just don't even know where to start."

"How about, the beginning," he suggested, as he opened the door for her. He stuck her suitcase in the back seat made a beeline to the driver's seat to hear her answer.

"Well the woman who interviewed me was really nice; we got along really well and she really liked my sketches and some of the stuff I did in class." He could tell she was trying to hold back some of her excitement…unsuccessfully.

"That's great! When do you hear if you got it?"

"She said next week sometime."

"Well that's awesome," he said. "I think we need to celebrate."

"Oh yeah? What'd you have in mind?"

"Well, we're pretty humble here in Stamford. There's nothing fancy like Chili's," he joked. She laughed, and he forgot how great it made him feel when she laughed at his jokes. "Feel like Italian?"

"Sounds great."

Capri was an Italian restaurant in the center of town with a relaxed and fun atmosphere. It was dimly lit, but the large bar and Friday night crowd kept it from being overly romantic. A band comprised of middle aged Italian men played lively music that kept people on the dance floor, which Jim and Pam sat next to.

"Whew," Pam said, leaning back in her seat. Her face was flushed from a combination of wine and laughing most of the way through dinner. "I'm stuffed."

Jim smiled as she looked out onto the dance floor. He took this opportunity to look at her, noticing little changes from the last time he saw her. Her hair was pulled back as usual, but it was straighter and shinier, although that might have been for the interview. Her eyes were bright and the corners of her mouth were turned up, giving her an overall look of contentment. He didn't know if he'd ever seen her like this.

He watched her swaying to the music as a slower song came on and before he could stop himself he asked, "Do you want to dance?"

She looked back at him with the same look of ease on her face. "Sure," she said, rising from her seat. He offered his hand and relished in the feel of her soft skin against his as she took it. He guided her to the dance floor, pulling her close and sliding his hand around her back. Goosebumps appeared on his skin as her hand settled on the back of his neck.

He'd never realized how small she was until she was flush against him, her temple resting against his shoulder as they moved slowly to the music. She tilted her head back to look at him and he didn't know if he'd ever seen anything so beautiful.

"So I guess this is like, our second date," she said softly, blushing and moving her eyes off of him.

"Second?" he asked, confused.

"Yeah, you know we had our first up on the roof that night. You made grilled cheese?"

"Oh right," he remembered. "You know, if we want this to be really romantic I could call up Dwight and have him light some fireworks in the parking lot," he joked. They were close enough that he could feel her chest move against his when she laughed. "Wait, I thought you said that wasn't a date because we didn't _really_ dance," he tried to joke, but still remembered how awkward he'd felt during that conversation.

She seemed to ponder this for a moment before turning serious. She looked back at him. "I think there were other reasons why that wasn't a real date." He nodded and looked away. "Still," she paused until his gaze met hers, "it was one of the best non-dates I've ever had."

He felt his heart speed up and wondered if she could feel it. "Pam…" he started, not really knowing what he was going to say.

"No, I mean…I was just saying," she fumbled, "it was really nice." She leaned back against his chest and he took that to mean the conversation was over.

"Yeah," he said softly, "it was."

He couldn't say how much longer they stayed on the dance floor, or even at the restaurant. Despite the fact he'd had little to drink, the drive home was a blur. All he knew was that he was now walking up his front stairs, carrying Pam's bag and fumbling for his keys.

He unlocked the door and swung it open, standing aside so she could enter. He set down her bag and flipped on the lights, pleasantly surprised when they didn't seem very bright. Closing the door behind him, he turned back to her, palms sweating, waiting for her to say something. He didn't know what to do. She just looked at him expectantly.

"So, this is it," He said, feeling awkward. "You wouldn't believe it but last week this place was covered in boxes."

"Oh yeah?" she said, looking around.

"Yeah, well I figured if I was going to have a visitor that I might want to make it look less like a prison cell."

"It looks good," she smiled at him. He noticed her eyes move past him, her body following until she stood in front of a familiar picture taped to his wall. She didn't say anything, just looked at it.

He came up beside her to looked at it too. "I really like that picture," he said honestly.

She smiled and looked down, shaking her head. "It's just a sketch."

He shook his head and looked at her. "Why do you do that?" he asked.

"What?" She met his eyes, looking genuinely confused.

"Act like it's not good," he said, trying not to be frustrated. "You're really talented Pam. They wouldn't even be considering you for this internship if you weren't." His eyes stayed locked on hers, daring her to look away.

"How do you do that?" She asked softly.

"What?"

"Believe in me like that," she said. Tears welling in her eyes, she looked down.

He lowered his head to her level and, placing a hand on her cheek, coaxed her into looking at him. "It's easy," he said, leaving out _when I'm in love with you. _

"Jim," she breathed, close enough that he could feel her breath on his lips. Her cheek leaned against his large hand and he used his thumb to swipe at a tear that had escaped from her eye.

She placed a hand on his chest and he thought she was going to push him away again. His heart sank into his stomach and he began to pull back when he felt her hand tighten on his shirt. Her eyes flickered between his eyes and his lips until she leaned forward and brushed her lips so lightly against his that he wasn't even sure it had happened.

She gave him a small smile. "Was that okay?" she said, so softly that he barely heard her.

He shook his head. "No," he said, "it should have been more like this." He pressed his lips against hers and dropped his hands to her hips. She slid her hands down his chest and leaned into him until his back was against the wall. His head was spinning as he felt her tongue against his lips.

Their kiss deepened until he was so lightheaded he had to break for air. "Wow," he said, not able to form any coherent thoughts. He kept his arms tight around her back, holding her close.

"Yeah," she said. They laughed when they noticed the goofy smiles on each other's faces. "You were right," she said, trying to be more serious and failing miserably. He tilted his head, confused. "That was better."

He smiled and seized her lips again, his senses spiraling until the only things he knew were her lips on his; her body in his arms.

-------------

TBC…Thanks for all the amazing reviews! Keep 'em coming! They keep me going!

Also, I should mention that for the next chapter, I'm going to change the rating to M (or T at the least), so if you're offended by that, you should wait for the next chapter, and if you aren't, remember to change the rating setting to "all."


	5. Complete

Starting Over

Chapter 5: Complete

Disclaimer: I own nothing

A/N: Thank you SO MUCH for reviewing. You guys are amazing! Just a reminder – this chapter IS rated M.

--------------------

Pam didn't know if she'd ever been so affected by a kiss. Well, by now it was much more than a kiss. His hands massaged her waist and hips as hers slid around him and under his shirt, the warm skin feeling like heaven under her fingers. Her lungs were assaulted by cold air as he tore his lips from hers and dragged them down to her neck. His hands inched up her sides until they brushed the undersides of her breasts. Her entire body was buzzing.

Her breath was hitched and erratic and the sound echoed around the living room. The sound was deafening.

"Jim," she tried to speak evenly but it came out more like a moan.

"Hmm?" came his muffled voice before he detached himself from her neck to look at her.

She grinned, "I think I'm ready for that house tour now," she said, hoping he'd understand what she meant.

He did. "Oh yeah?" she nodded. "Where would you like to start?"

She gathered more courage than she knew she had. "Your bedroom." She tried to be serious and sexy, but she was too elated to keep the smile from her face. Especially when Jim beamed one back at her. He leaned down and kissed her again, quickly, before pulling back.

"Are you sure about this?" He asked as her heart melted.

She shook her head, "No," she said honestly, "but I'm sure about you."

He groaned and smiled, leaning his head against hers. "You're killin' me Beesly."

She laughed and pulled away from him, taking one of his hands and leading him towards the stairs. She took a deep breath as they walked upstairs together, his thumb tracing small circles on the inside of her wrist. She couldn't remember if she'd ever been this turned on.

She started walking down the hall with him still behind her, wondering if he was ever going to tell her where to go when she felt his hand on her waist, guiding her into his bedroom.

As they walked in, he snaked his hand around to her stomach, pulling her close against him. She felt her lower abdomen quiver under his touch as she struggled to keep standing. He released her hand and brought his up to her neck. Brushing her hair aside, he placed kisses along collarbone, moving out towards her shoulders. She leaned her head back, granting him further access. He ran his hands up her sides, then down her arms and entwined his fingers with hers, covering them completely.

The tightening between her legs was becoming unbearable and she knew she wouldn't be able to last much longer without touching him back. She walked them over to the bed and spun around to face him. His hooded eyes looked down at her with so much emotion it almost overwhelmed her.

She stepped out of her shoes, giving him yet another couple inches on her, and pushed them away with the side of her foot. She was still looking at the ground when she felt his hands in her hair, gently unfastening her barrette. He let it fall to the floor and ran his fingers through her tresses. Letting out a deep breath he murmured "You're so beautiful," and kissed her before she had a chance to blush or doubt him.

She ran her hands up his chest and slowly and uncoordinatedly started to unbutton his shirt. He pushed against her and she fell onto the bed as her knees buckled against the edge. They let out a joint giggle and he smiled as he followed her onto the bed. She felt his weight on her and she'd forgotten how much she missed that. She could see the lust in his eyes and it made her feel sexy and desirable and…_loved._

His hands seemed to be everywhere, as did his lips. They had yet to take off a single item of clothing but she was already more stimulated than she'd ever been. Jim was taking his time; savoring every inch of her.

She tugged him up towards her face, causing him to abandon the trail he was kissing down her stomach. He looked into her eyes and his expression immediately turned to one of concern.

"What is it? Are you okay?" he asked, genuinely worried.

She smiled and nodded. "It's just that…" she hated the words she was about to say, but she needed him to know. "God, this is so embarrassing," she looked away.

"What? You can tell me." He was smiling but she could tell he was nervous.

"Roy's the only person who I've ever…been with," she blurted out.

"And?"

"I just feel like I don't even know what I'm doing." She was mortified. If the lights had been on she was sure she'd be bright red from head to toe.

His laugh surprised her. So did his kiss. "Trust me," he said, "you're doing just fine."

His words gave her a renewed sense of confidence. "Only fine?" she smiled.

"More than fine. Great," he kissed her lips. "Amazing." Kiss. "Incredible." Kiss, kiss. He made his way down her neck as his hands inched up her waist under her shirt. He pulled it up until her bra was almost showing and looked at her, asking for permission. She nodded and he peeled it off her, looking down at her body with reverence before diving back down.

He kissed her chest and worked his way down to the space between her breasts. She ran her hands through his hair, urging him on. He pulled the fabric down and lavished attention to one nipple, then the other. He smiled as they stood up and he put her bra back in place. She pushed against his chest, forcing him to move to a kneeling position. She sat, her legs on either side of his, and finished unbuttoning his shirt.

She slid it off his shoulders and ran her hands lightly down his chest examining every crevice, loving the definition she found there. His breath hitched as her hands fell to his belt, shaking a little as she unbuckled it. The button was a little easier, the zipper even more so. Before she knew it, Jim was kneeling in front of her in nothing but his boxers.

In the back of her mind, she knew she should be more nervous, or at least hesitant, but all she could think was how much she wanted him. She reached behind his neck and pulled him down for a kiss, moving her hands to his waist band. He shook his head and mumbled against her lips. She pulled back and looked at him, loving the spark in his eyes as he said "It's your turn."

He moved his hands around her back and unfastened her bra, immediately replacing it with his hands as it slid off. He pressed her back to the mattress and massaged his way down to her skirt. He found the small zipper on the side and eased it down, surprising her when he lifted her hips effortlessly to pull the skirt down her legs.

She was suddenly very aware that they were both only in their underwear, and pleased to see the tent that had formed in Jim's. When he came back to kiss her she grasped his erection through his boxers. He groaned and she began to move her hand.

He inched his fingers into her panties and Pam's hips surged upwards as he slid one finger inside her. She lost all coordination as he added another finger and his thumb began to move on her clit. His fingers were long and skilled and she moved her hips to his tempo. He threaded his other hand through hers, holding it above her head.

Her breathing was deep and erratic and her legs began to quiver as he moved his fingers faster and leaned down to kiss her. She was unprepared as her orgasm gripped her, her body arching into his touch. She tore her mouth from his, gasping for air.

He was being sweet and tender, kissing her shoulders while she rode out the effects but she needed more. She grabbed him on either side of his face and pulled him back so she could look him in the eye. "I need you, now," she breathed.

He just nodded, quickly discarding of their remaining clothing and placing himself at her entrance. He locked into her gaze before kissing her deeply and pushing himself inside her. She moaned loudly into his mouth as he filled her completely.

He started moving and she couldn't believe that in just a few moments she was back on the brink again. She wrapped her legs around him, locking her ankles to pull him in as deeply as she could.

"Oh, Jesus," he groaned, picking up the pace.

She felt removed from herself as she vaguely heard sounds she didn't know she could make. He reached between them, stroking her and sending her over the edge. Sensation ripped through her as the waves of her orgasm washed over her. Jim was still, his lips tasting her neck.

"That was amazing," she said, still breathless.

He pulled back to look at her, a devious smile on his face. "You didn't think we were done, did you?" He asked, not waiting for an answer before starting again.

He moved in and out of her, lavishing her with kisses and whispered words. Every time she'd get close, he would slow down, letting her excitement ebb until finally she couldn't take it anymore.

"Jim," she whimpered, almost begging him.

He took the hint and plunged into her with long, deep strokes. Immediately her climax rushed through her, intensifying as Jim buried his head in her shoulder moaning her name as he came inside her.

They stayed like that for awhile, waiting for their breathing to return to normal. Pam hugged him tightly, not wanting the moment to end. Finally Jim moved off of her, and Pam tried to quell the feeling of emptiness that always accompanied this action. Before she could even think twice, he pulled her into his arms, kissing her forehead and rubbing small circles on her back.

Pam couldn't remember a time when she'd ever felt this…complete. They drifted to sleep, encased in a bubble of contentedness, warm in each other's arms.

-------------

TBC…?

You guys have been awesome with the reviews! Sorry this chapter took a little longer, but well, I had a busy weekend. Plus, it's the first real sex scene I've ever written so it took a little longer. I'm pretty sure I'm going to keep going, but let me know what you think! xo


End file.
